Music

Sister (singing like the Black Eyed Peas): Whatcha gonna do with all that junk, all that junk inside your trunk? Dad (obviously having no idea that it's a song) : I'll tell you what you're going to do with all of it, clean it out! (followed by a long, angry lecture about the various junk my sister had left in the trunk of the car and needed to take out)

(My dad in response to Tyler, the Creator's "Bitch Suck Dick") Dad: Did he just say he's f**king a unicorn? Me: Yes, yes he sure did Dad: I don't blame him.... I'd f**k a unicorn, they're sexy as hell.