(Meow from outside door) Mom: I hear a kitty! (Opens door) Mom: Wait, where's the kitty? Was there ever a kitty? Am I on drugs?
(There was a priest who visited my great-grandfather after my great-uncle died. He was looking at my great-grandfather's garden.) Priest: Are those pansies out there? Great-Grandfather: Can I tell you a secret? Priest: Sure, that's what I'm here for. Great-Grandfather: It's Hungarian marijuana.
Clearly we are dealing with some high-quality journalism here.
Party hard over on After 12!
Dad seemed way too down with the notion that his wife's crazy though.
(Discussing Breaking Bad) Me: You're not a chemist so your meth wouldn't be like glass. Dad: Yeah, you need ketchup with my meth.
Dad: I did alot of crazy things when I was a kid. Me: Like what? Dad: Well once I did a whole bunch of cocaine and threw a TV through a ten story window. Good thing you only do pot. Me: I... I got nothin'...
(We were listening to the radio on the way to school, and a report came on saying how some old people ate brownies with pot.) Me (referring to that 70's show): Haha magic brownies... Mom: We could use those to send grandma to the other side...
