(After the "Don't Ask, Don't Tell" was lifted.) Mom: So, NOW will you tell me you're gay? Me: MOM! I'm not gay! Why would you think that? Mom: Because you joined the Navy! Real men join the Marines! Me: Dad was in the AirForce! Mom: ... Why won't you give me grandchildren?! Me: Thinning the herd.
(My Mom was watching the TV when I joined her. She had no idea I was gay.) Mom: Any nice boys in your class? Me: No. Mom: Any nice boys in another class? Me: No. Mom: Do you even look at the boys? Me: ... No, not really. Mom: You prefer girls? Me: ... Yes. Mom: Any nice girls in your class?
(My brother finally telling our parents he's gay.) Mom: You can't be gay, you're not good looking and you have no fashion sense.
