(Driving down the road nice and smoothly with my dad. Soon traffic hits and we come to an almost stop.) Dad: What are we stopped for? A sex toy party? Me: Wha...? Dad: I brake for edible underwear!
Mom: Don't leave your windows cracked. Someone might put a snake in your car.
(I've been learning to drive for about six months, and I'm driving a different car than I normally do.) Me: How do you turn on the lights for this car? Mama: Why do you need the lights? Me: Uhm... Because I don't want to die?
To be fair, this is kind of how all metal sounds to me.
