Awkward

The arresting spectacle that is an adult reverting before your eyes, back to red-faced-angry-baby-shit-packed-diaper-mode is unsettling as it is strangely entertaining --- a train-wreck of a mental meltdown, and you can't seem to look away for the life of you. Kind of like impressively immature reality TV that's populated by pompous, psychotically self-concerned, silicone-altered wannabe celebrities that are always jacked up on Svedka and elementary level gossip. Or, or maybe you've experienced one of these shitshows firsthand. Maybe it was a permanent marker-sniffing, cigarette-munching, vaguely homeless woman who was working on a six pack of high life on the bus yesterday, while you and the unfortunate sea of weary spectators were just trying to get home. Yes, that happened on one of the evening commutes to me. Never thought I'd mention it, till now. Well, sit back, buckle up, and be thankful you weren't around for one of these eruptions.

This unicorn cake ended up being extra horny...

Ugh seriously not cool MAAAM and DAAAD. These two parents had to go and set the tone of an otherwise nice check-up convo between loving family members, to instead a paralyzing level of awkwardness. But hey, I'll be the first to suggest that group chats inherently suck -- no matter who is involved. This is the rock-bottom of terrible group chats though, that much is for sure. Though, I might take the quick and deadly stab of cringe in this conversation, over the 98 notifications that last Friday's group chat bitchslapped my deeply irritated phone with.