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He's actually mimicking a string bass instead of drums, but the result is still pretty impressive.

But then the Great Evil crept into the kingdom, its advance troops "The Real World" and "Road Rules" readying the way for a full-scale invasion by the gruesome forces of "My Super Sweet Sixteen," "Newlyweds," "Laguna Beach," "The Ashlee Simpson Show," and "Jersey Shore."

At this rate, the only AC/DC Angus is going to need will be to power his pacemaker.

It's been, what, 20 years since their first album?

My discerning ear tells me that it CERTAINLY isn't black metal.

In an age where we fetishize outdated technology, it's hard to tell if this guy is way behind the times, or far ahead of it. I wouldn't be surprised if everyone carried a phonograph around with them instead of an iPod by the year 2030.

What if we made a mixtape of floppy drive music?

After their moment of popularity, many bands spend an indeterminate amount of time in music purgatory before they become retro and cool again. While in purgatory, legions of 12-year-olds scoff at them cruelly.

You still tear up every time you hear this song, even after the billionth time. Admit it.

Steven Tyler's search for his dentures: story on page 30.