drunk

Disclaimer: This failed party trick video doesn't show you anything graphic but feel free to skip this video if you're a bit attached to your nose.

From NJ:

Harden located the car, a gray Toyota van, parked by the store's loading dock with its engine running, lights on and music blaring, the lieutenant said.

The driver, Brian Chellis, 23, of Cedar Grove, was asleep behind the wheel, wearing an "Elf on the Shelf" costume, Macintosh said.

After shutting off the car's engine and waking Chellis, the sergeant detected a strong odor of an alcoholic beverage on his breath, the lieutenant said.

WARNING: Language in this video, and drunk white people getting immediate karma for driving drunk.

"Och! To 'ell with thus! Ahm doone fookin' aroond with all a' ye!"

From WFTV:

An intoxicated New Smyrna Beach man wanted Taco Bell, but employees wouldn't serve him because he was on a bicycle in the drive-through lane, authorities said.

They called New Smyrna Beach police when Gabriel Harris, 33, refused to leave after placing an order at the drive-through window as the restaurant was closing just after 3 a.m. on Sunday.

His is the human condition, the struggle we all face. Bless you, drunk-munchies cyclist guy.