drugs

From the Smoking Gun:

A trio of teenage burglars who stole cash, jewelry, electronics, and prescription drugs from a Missouri residence also thought they got away with a stash of c0caine they found in a wooden box, only to later discover that the powder was actually the cremated remains of the homeowner’s father, police report.

Upon determining that they were not, in fact, in possession of c0caine, the teens discarded the remains out the window of their getaway car. One of the burglars actually tasted the powder and realized it was not a controlled substance. 

The idea behind these videos is that pot makes you slow, like a sloth... get it?  Unfortunately, any seriousness behind this message urging kids to stay away from drugs is lost as soon as a hilarious, giant sloth shows up and starts making weird grunting noises while knocking stuff down around them at a glacial pace. 



People on the Stoner Sloth Facebook page are questioning if this is real and Stoner Sloth responds!




The official Tumblr for Stoner Sloth is copyrighted by New South Wales Department of Premier and Cabinet and the governmental branding is also on the Stoner Sloth Facebook page so, yes, it really seems to be a real thing. 

Yep. That looks about like the face you'd expect. From My Fox Chicago:

Fulton was taken to a police station where police say he admitted to being extremely high on meth and to drinking vodka earlier in the evening. Police say he started splashing himself with toilet water to try and cool off, but became very sick.

Skip to around the 1:00 mark or so. WARNING: Maybe not entirely safe for work.

I lost it at about the point when she apologized for tooth-murder.