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Via ViralHog
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Thought you had to live a messed up life and die to lay eyes on the fiery pits of hell. Clearly, I thought wrong.

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Via CBS Miami
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Brought to you fresh and fried out of Lecanto, Florida, The Citrus County Sheriff's Office arrested a woman on shoplifting and drug paraphernalia charges. She was apprehended amidst a shopping cart fueled joyride out of hell.

The woman's been identified as Josseleen Elida Lopez, 25. Lopez was held after scarfing down $32.36 worth of food and wine. She told the authorities she's homeless.

If you're going to hit rock bottom, at least eat some chicken, and wash it down with some wine right? In all seriousness we wish Lopez the best on her road to recovery. Deputies disclosed to the press that they found two empty syringes after arresting Lopez, which she claims she used to inject crystal meth.

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Crazy Vegan Accuses Meat-Eater Of 'Cultural Appropriation' For Liking Tofu

We have absolutely no problem with anyone's dietary choices, but sometimes passions can cause people to act like a-holes. We're pretty sure most vegans absolutely would not have a problem with a non-vegan enjoying tofu, because honestly why would they? 

Unfortunately people like this person give the normal vegans out there a bad name!

Text message conversation about a vegan who gets angry at a non-vegan for liking tofu
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Tumblr Thread: Customers' Mythically Powerful Coffee Orders

The life of a barista is a weird one. When every customer you have is someone who hasn't had their first coffee of the day, there's no knowing what kind of people can lumber in. Some take on the challenge and become a barista that's the living definition of chaotic good. Others just stand in awe and watch a 46-year-old woman drink 8 Red Bulls worth of caffeine in a single swig.

Tumblr thread on customers crazy coffee orders | say this jokingly but had customer actually order pumpkin spice latte with 9 shots espresso (also no whip) and asked her verify she did indeed want 9 shots espresso she looked dead eyes and said have 5 kids" witchcraft-with-space-bean once had woman come and ordered an Americano with 19 shots espresso drink took ages held up line asked
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Thank You Florida, Now For Something Completely Different: An Alligator in Yoga Pants

You almost wish this headline was just click-bait. But unfortunately (or fortunately depending on how you see it), this actually happened. A routine traffic stop turned bizarre is this week's Florida headline. A couple was pulled over in May after running a stop sign, and deputies asked them what they had been doing, and they responded searching for frogs and snakes to collect. The deputies asked them if they had any other creatures in the truck, and that is when things took a turn for the weird.The woman had over 40 turtles in a Ninja Turtles backpack, which was definitely an eye-opener. But that is not what shocked the officers. 

The woman in the truck, Ariel Le Quire, after being asked if she had anything else, promptly pulled a foot-long alligator from the yoga pants she was wearing, and placed it in the bed of the pickup truck. The pair were cited and a judge found little humor in her stunt. sentencing Le Quire to 6 months probation, 200 hours of community service, and required her to pay $500 to the Florida Fish and Wildlife Conservation Commission. This was all for charges of possessing an American Alligator, transporting more than one turtle or turtle egg, one count of possessing a soft-shell turtle, and one count of possessing more than one turtle, per day. 

The woman was also homeless at the time, so it is uncertain how the court expects her to pay the fine. But internet ridicule is sometimes a better teacher than any monetary penance could be.

Homeless Florida Woman Pulls Alligator Out Of Yoga Pants During Routine Traffic Stop
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Via heidel420
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A woman was tailgating a car in Northern California this weekend, and she went full speed towards Crazy Town after the passengers made "a rude hand gesture" to her.

The 50-year-old woman, Dierdre Orozco, drove her Ford Explorer in front of the girls to get them to stop. She also pretended to be a police officer, even getting out of her car at one point and approaching them with some sort of ID.

When this strategy failed, she decided to start ramming them off the road.

The crazy woman was eventually arrested when she went off the exit.

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Mad Lads That Are Agents Of Pure Chaos

Oh boy, buckle on up for a rollercoaster of pure and unadulterated madness. Yes, we're talking about the mad lads of the world. Those lads that are agents of chaos, and consistently defy expectations. They're reckless, fearless, and very good at irritating other people online. Like that one dude with the great one-liner that got him booted from the Flat Earther group. Dang shame, really. 

Times that people were total mad lads online | Chronic Insomniac @HoneyCinnamon_ My uncle just sent message family group asking money privately messaged him asking banking details so can deposit He responded saying he doesn't actually need money. He asked money so nobody family would ask him money | lan Sausage @stephenjmolloy 3S @NatGeo Can please follow back so can DM got some new research is going blow mind! Following National Geographic O @NatGeo Follows Ducks don't actually
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