It's exactly what you think it is.
The 4000 word short story is about the "smartwatch prototype that mysteriously arrives at the door" of one Christie Aackerlund. Finally, someone who had the creative chutzpah to ask "how does a watch pork a real live human being?"
As the author lists on their Amazon page, however, the story is "only for super mature people who can handle it."
Ethan is the app lets you anonymously message one Ethan Gliechtenstein, who will (time pending) send you a pithy response. Assuming he's not asleep.
Biology and evolution are pretty crazy, and these tweets point out just how absurd some specimens of the animal kingdom really are. Like, for real, who the hell decided to give spiders butt ropes? Were they not already terrifying enough as is? On the bright side, thank God they can't fly though, amirite?
Some more Funny Tweets here.
