sexy times

What fresh hell is this? Sure, if that's actually her (and this isn't some perverse, bottom-feeding catfish at work) she clearly takes care of herself. And yeah, there's something to be said of the sexually fierce, if not experimental personalities when it comes to bedroom discourse; but bro, this is seven kinds of crazy, and outright ridiculous. The only reasonable course of action for our Tinder dude victim of the hour is to take his phone, toss it in the microwave, set to five minutes, and let it rip into a weird, fresh-fried memory of the past.