weddings

Marriage pretty much spells the end of this for you, buddy.

Aaron Chervenak took his relationship with his cellphone to the next level and got married to it last month. The two eloped at the Little Vegas Chapel in Las Vegas.

“In a sense, my smartphone has been my longest relationship,” he said. “That’s why I decided to see what it was like to actually marry a phone.”

Come on, at least you'll get to hook up with some bridesmaids and/or the bride's cute sister.

Super Wedding, to the rescue!

There's no better way to end a wedding than to fly off with his-and-her water-propelled jetpacks.

Plus there's a good chance you'll find someone to hook up with at the wedding anyway.