wait what

DISCLAIMER - There may be some inappropriate language in this video but... to be honest, we just don't know.

The fact that Fifty Shades of Grey is pornographic is really the least of its problems.

Seattleite Babylonia Aivaz (yep, that's her real name) declared her undying love for and married a warehouse scheduled for demolition as a gentrification protest. She says her "heart is tied to this warehouse," and specified that since the warehouse is female (well obviously) it's a gay marriage. However, the building is slated to be completely demolished by mid-February, so she could just be a gold digger.

As strange as this story is, people

Object Sexuality (n) - a pronounced emotional and often romantic desire towards developing significant relationships with particular inanimate objects. I hope these couples are very happy together, and that the human-amusement park ride fusion children one day take over the Earth.