underage

The date went splendidly until Jimmy started drawing penises all over Big Bird and crude breasts on Smurfette. He spent the rest of the night in the time-out corner while Jenny's mom, finally giving in to Jenny's insistent wails, went out to buy a new coloring book.

It's fine, you can speak in the first person. And congratulations on having such high self-esteem - not many people can say "I have such a good body" so directly. Maybe you should date yourself; at least you're much closer to your own age.

Maybe you should make more friends so they can tell you the same thing.

Ladies, please, I have very high standards. Applicants must be between 18 and 90, and anyone outside of that range will not be considered. I won't take just anyone.