stalker

Girl. STAHP!

To be fair, you should expect as much getting into the online dating scene.

Drunkards, like puppies, will sometimes follow you home if you're too nice. And then curl up and sleep on your doorstep.

If you receive a card like this on Valentine's Day, please contact your local authorities. And purchase some mace.

Even people who aren't allowed within 500 feet of certain women (or men) (or any children) celebrate Valentine's Day.