p33n

That's an awfully suggestive finger.

I've always wanted to lie naked in the middle of a major metropolitan thruway, so that if I stayed there long enough Google maps would eventually update their pictures through their satellites and I would be able to say that my penis can be seen from space.

I didn't know Anthony Weiner used Yahoo Answers. HEYOOOOO

Also, if you're an expert at spotting male "equipment," we're hosting a scavenger hunt for suggestively-shaped turkeys over at FAIL Blog tomorrow! The winner gets to be a guest editor for a day. ARE YOU EXCITED YET? Check it out when you're finished hyperventilating!

I didn't know that Skittles and penises were such a popular combination.

"Hey babe, did I tell you about my penis? Can I have your number? Thanks."

"Ooooh, yeah, then I'm gonna poke those weird pouches beneath it, yeah. With my finger."

I guess it's time to add "BIG P33N DOES NOT KILL YOU" to the health education curriculum.