headline

A young Colombian woman inserted a potato inside herself in a terrible attempt at contraception. After leaving the potato inside for TWO ENTIRE WEEKS she discovered the potato had started to germinate and grow roots. Colombia Reports claims the offending potato was removed without surgery, and the lasting effects should be psychological only.

The most shocking aspect of this idiotic ordeal is that it the Colombian woman's mother gave her daughter the idea to shove a potato inside of her vagoober. INB4 moms in the United States decide that the birth control pill gives you autism and start stockpiling potatoes.

Also, I like how the headline says "girls" but the subtitle starts with "women." Whoever wrote the headline was a classy, classy guy.