comic

"Hey, where do you sleep?"

"In a bed."

"Me too!"

It's easy, try some of your own!

I need to have a mirror in front of my face so that I can see what I look like at all times. It might make it harder for other people to see my face, but it's not like my face was ever an asset anyway.

"No," she replied with a smile. "I peed." Then they got married and lived happily ever after, until one day when he walked in to find her pooping instead of peeing. There was a messy divorce and an embittering, soul-deadening custody battle. The end.

Do you really want to date someone who eats as many Fritos, smells as atrociously, and is as socially incapacitated as you? Please. Date others as you would have them date unto you.

Either that, or he'll go on the "man" pill as soon as she goes off the "lady" pill. #Viagra

And then I wept over how single I was.