Valentines day

Now everyone's super choosy and I'm just alone with my creys.

Over/under on how many roses it takes to get make-up sex...

I'm not sure whether I should squee or puke...

Today I learned that "foams" is slang for "shoes." I'm very white.

"Siri, will we be together forever?" asked the user. "Even longer" Siri answered.

From the submitter:

What can I say to my bestfriend on such a cliche day? Something that will get a rise out her. What is a BFF with a vast library of bathroom humor to do?!

The best valentines day poem I could *come* up with

Don't be forever alone on Valentine's Day, head on over to Dating Fails!