love

I'm not sure ANYTHING lasts as long as that.

The next time someone tells you that you hurt their feelings, try responding the same way Siri did. I can guarantee that you'll get thrown to the ground, unless the person you're speaking to had bought you and you're valued at several hundred dollars. That's why Siri gets a free pass.

In how many song titles can we replace the word "love" with "E" and pretend it's about drugs? All I've got is "All You Need Is E," "The Power of E," and "It's Only E."

The Romeo and Juliet balcony scene took place in the early morning, too. This is from an evil alternate-reality Romeo and Juliet who spend the entire play throwing pithy one-line insults at each other. They both wear goatees.

It'd still be a fail even if s/he hadn't missed the "r" in "shirts." YES SMELLING OTHER PEOPLE'S SHIRTS IS CREEPY.

It's no fun dating a grammar nazi.

This just warms the cockles of my heart. And arouses it at a very reasonable rate.

An addiction that creates stress, speeds the aging process, and eats at your bank account? Yep, sounds like parenting. Or crack. But mostly parenting.