grammar nazi

Dear Diary, today a stranger generously corrected my grammar for me. I learned valuable lessons about parts of speech and I hope my spoken English adheres more faithfully to standard usage. Thank you, kind stranger, thank you.

What are you trying to say about British people?

As a species, iPhone whales have to pay very close attention to their facial hair. A few inches can mean the difference between a hipster and a Nazi.

Also, *conscience.

Don't forget the comma between "spelling" and "smart arse!" Or the incomplete ellipses after "arse!" Or the period between "spelling" and "what's!" And to capitalize "what's!" Or to end your sentences with a period or a question mark!

It's no fun dating a grammar nazi.

Men! Good grammar is like fresh breath and a clean shirt! Never go without it when you're impressing the ladies. Also, it can lead to some confusion...

A simple solution would be to not read other people's text messages.

This is why relationships between intelligent women and hunky shirtless men don't last long.

Hahaha, just kidding. Sorry, less-hunky shirted men and knuckle-dragging women.