train

"We're looking for a caucasian male, about six foot ten inches, wears a chrome helmet, and goes by the name Lord Zedd."

Halp plz I am not good with subway train!

Apparently, the man was rather small in stature to begin with (which means he probably can't hold his liquor, which explains why he passed out on train tracks). Because of this, he fit in the gap between the track surface and the train cars. After the train stopped, Canadian Pacific railway personnel found him under one of the rear train cars, after which he promptly got up and just continued on his merry way. Miraculous, eh?

Party hard over on After 12!

British Transport Police released this video of a fantastically drunk woman at Barnsley Station managing to accidentally fall under a train. Luckily, the woman not only survived, but walked away with only minor cuts and bruises. Hopefully next time she'll just call a cab.