sms

Jeez, Mom, lern2mixers.

I've heard of the "call of nature," but the text of nature? That's new.

Maybe the fine folks at Autocowrecks can help you out.

She was on a little bit of a bad ass streak.

Excuse me, I'm fluent in Drunkish. Ahem!

"Hey man, I'm all for Hugo asking Bruno out on a date. They really seem like they have a lot in common."

"Let me re-phrase, I'm STRON[G]LY in favor of it!"

"What????"

"They go together like N and Ñ in the Spanish alphabet!"

"I'd like to talk to you on the phone about it, but it's too damn loud in here."

"Lord, that's odd! The po-po just showed up to the party and they just signed up on the beer pong table queue!"

This summer, some guy named Mark is...

The Warned Identity.

More phone phunny over at Autocowrecks!

Please don't kill me!

"Jesus 5:14 (or something): Thou shalt pick ur parents up and driev them wherever they want lol."

"Dad... I think you just made that one up..."

But how many is an emoticon worth? Ten?

We have the top scientists trying to figure what the hell you said.

Sun, we're very disappointed in you.

"Happy Holidaze, Mom!" "Aaahhh, now I get it! Happy Holidaze to you too, Son!"

"Alright, who's on coconut milk duty?"

"I don't know, ask these guys.