(In my Oma's kitchen talking about how much tile i put down while fixing the house. I'm female.)
Me: You see these hands?! These are the hands of a working man!
Oma: With a rack like that, I don't think you're much of a man.
Me: You knew what I meant!
(My grandmother calls me from her room.)
Grandmother: What are you doing?
Me: Watching television in your room.
Grandmother: You never walk into a lady's room because you might find her toys.
Me: I hate you.
See more fashion disasters at Poorly Dressed!
(Talking with my grandmother about how hard it was raising kids in the 60's)
Me: Gramma? If it was so hard raising the first three, why did you keep having kids?
Gramma: Well, Joel... Me and your grandfather liked to have sex.
Me: ... (Image hasn't left my head to this day)
(We were listening to the radio on the way to school, and a report came on saying how some old people ate brownies with pot.)
Me (referring to that 70's show): Haha magic brownies...
Mom: We could use those to send grandma to the other side...
(My 70-something year old grandparents were telling me of a time that they were stalked by a mountain lion during a family campout.)
Grandma: So there we were just strolling through the forest whe-
Grandpa: No, YOU were strolling, I was walking like a MAN!
(My mom and my grandma talking during dinner.)
Grandma: (talking about our dog) When I went for a drive with Jake in the back seat he just laid on the floor and cried.
Grandma: Yeah, he just laid down and started crying.
Mom: That's what I do every time I'm in a car with you driving.
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