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Family FAILs & WINs
(My mom was talking to her self at the store) Me: Mom who are you talking too? Mom: Myself, I have to talk louder than the voices in my head.
Clearly somebody is very familiar with the art.
(Talking about my mum's partner.) Sister: But you do love each other, I know that. Mum: It's a fine line between love and hate and the cutlery drawer. Sister: You're never too old to- Mum: To stab someone? No.
Me: *putting on chapstick* Dad: Is that stuff good for chapped lips? I wonder if that'd work for my asshole... maybe I should get some.
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