When delivering papers during your Teachers Aide period use the front door. The poster on the back door will fall on you. Seventh graders will laugh. Your brilliant response will be "STUFF IS FALLING DOWN".
Everyone will laugh. Including the teacher
His assessment of the situation was spot-on.
Never attempt a high kick in socks, you will slip, fall, and your friends will laugh at you.
Don't try to catch a falling hot-glue gun. #LFMF
Right after my husband and I got married we were sleeping and I rolled over. At the same time, he had a dream that I was falling off a cliff. He grabs me and pins me to the mattress and screams "DON'T FALL!!!" I haven't let him live that down. #LFMyHusband'sFail
Do not go chasing after your three year old niece when you're playing outside, hollering "I'm going to catch you!" to make her squeal and run away. When you do catch her, she will drop her weight like a stone and make you loose your balance and trip. Your efforts to protect her in the fall will succeed. You, however, will not be so lucky, and will face-plant into the side walk. Fixing the tooth you broke will be expensive. #LFMF.
If you fall on your face in public, just lay there. It makes the situation a lot less awkward. #LFMF
If you ever get a really good, fast spin going in an office chair, don't let go of the armrests thinking you can sit back and let it wind down. The momentum will send you careening into the wall of your cubicle, from where you will dizzily spin into another coworker's space, collapsing heavily onto their lunch. There will be a fairly large number of people demanding explanations. #LFMF
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