His Wife Wouldn't Let Him Trash Their Useless Garage Junk, So He Hung It Up Inside as Art Instead

Redditor michaelsiemsen found the perfect way to hold onto all of the useless stuff in his garage his wife wouldn't let him throw away.

"For the past two years, anything sitting in our garage that the wife says we can't get rid of, I've hung as "art" in our otherwise useless front room" -- michaelsiemsen

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Glorify God with your vagina! Christian marriage blog To Love, Honor, and Vacuum (ED - Oxford comma added) has tips on all facets of marriage and intimacy, all from a Good Christian Perspective. They address a number of questions one might have, but our favorites are:

  1. Is it okay for Christians to use sex toys? Answer: Nope. "Most guys aren't that big. And they can't vibrate like that. Do you really want to get reliant on something your husband can never be for an orgasm?

  2. What's a godly form of birth control? Answer: forget condoms, just watch the calendar, you'll be fine (Edit - no you won't).

  3. What should I do if my husband wants to be adventurous in bed? Answer: it's fine, but be careful! Getting adventurous could enable his porn addiction! (Edit - ...what?)

  4. What to do if I'm too loose to have sex? Answer: Kegel exercises! Just be careful not to accidentally buy sex toys when you shop for kegel exercisers online! (Edit - ಠ_ಠ )

  5. What if my husband wants sex way more than I do? Answer: Joyfully and obediently give it to him whenever he wants it! (Edit - facepalm.jpg)