world record

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I've never grasped how one goes about performing this impressive move without proceeding to eliminate armies of necessary brain cells. Dude, I've had a hard enough time managing to crush beer cans with my forehead on the rowdier, booze-soaked weekends of my life. 

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This 105-Year-Old Man Just Set a New Cycling World Record, So Maybe You Could Go Outside Once Today

Age ain’t nothing but an excuse.

This 105-year-old man just set a new cycling world record. 105. Years. Old. Our target demo is, like, 14 to 30, which means you have no excuse for spending so much time with those dang video games. X-Box One. More like X-Box None until you set a world record.

via Burger Records

The Associated Press reports that Robert Marchand, who had once been told by a coach to give up because he was never going to achieve anything on that bike, “set a world record in the 105-plus age category — created especially for the tireless veteran — by riding 22.547 kilometers (14.010 miles) in one hour.”

Marchand isn’t just a world record holder, he’s spent time during his 105 years working as a firefighter, a truck driver, and a lumberjack, and only took up biking at 68. Man, we’re all so pathetic compared to this dude.

The Huffington Post says that “the cyclist can attribute his athleticism to eating fruits and vegetables, not smoking, drinking wine in moderation, exercising daily and going to bed at 9 p.m.”

Better get to work.

old man breaks world record for cycling
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The future is now.

A Canadian man named Catalin Alexandru Duru has set the new world record for longest distance traveled on a hoverboard.

While this might just seem like fictional story from “Back to the Future 2,” it’s actually very real.

Watch in the clip above as Duru travels 905 feet and 2 inches across Lake Ouareau in Quebec using a prototype device that he built over a period of just one year.

“I will showcase that stable flight can be achieved with a machine one can stand on and control with their feet,” he said.

Unlike with the hoverboard in the movie, he’s lifted off the surface to a height of about 5 meters using his propeller-based board, and it looks a bit more dangerous than Marty McFly’s version.

Although this probably will helps the average rider avoid crashing into large piles of manure.

“This is a truly mesmerising and incredible feat in the world of engineering and transportation,” saida Guinness World Records spokesperson about the news. “It’s always pleasing to see individuals such as Catalin Alexandru Duru achieve a Guinness World Records titles such as this in which personal endeavour continues to amaze us all.”