tear

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I mean, in the grand scheme of things how does "nearly-pantsless" compare to "drugged out and licking the windows"? You could do worse.

Side slit, back slit, FRONT slit even, but the elusive "double slit" has yet to truly catch on.

First words, now holes? Soon we'll just do away with buttcovers completely.

Even though it might look cute... ...never ever ever store kittens in your back pocket. Use a waxed canvas bag instead. It's harder to claw out waxed canvas, and you won't suffer the grievance of having your dinner escape.