The world's been unpleasantly marred by plenty of DUI stop circus acts that hint at all signs of sweet genuine stupidity; but this one ranks right up there with the best (worst) of 'em. Not only did she endanger the lives of others by getting her drunken, albeit bodacious bosom behind the wheel; but she put on a cartwheel show, AND assaulted our poor cop of the hour's valiant manhood.
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Via Metro
James Meyers of Concord, NC was pulled over because his break light was out. This turned into the police serving him an arrest warrant for a movie he rented and failed to return to a store that has since been closed 14 years ago.
Meyers tells the whole story in this video :
The movie in question? 'Freddy Got Fingered', a 2001 box office failure starring Tom Green. 
Hopefully, he at least enjoyed the movie. Not many people did.
Tom Green has found out about this and has told the Daily News that he'd happily pay the $200 fine attached to the warrent if it would help. 
via @tomgreenlive
Via Catastrophic
Step aside, Nobel Prize winners, because these dudes are right on your tails.
Presumably after discussing nuclear physics, two Kentucky men allegedly moved their conversation to more pressing matters: Robbing a BBQ restaurant where the local police chief just happened to be eating at. How did the chief find out? Well, these two guys, who just have to be direct descendants of Einstein or something, pocket dialed 911 while they were discussing the plans.
A local NBC affiliate picked up the story, reporting:
“According to the Danville Advocate Messenger, police say two suspects were sitting inside their car outside of Brothers' BBQ, discussing their plans to rob the restaurant. Unfortunately for them, one of the men had accidentally pocket dialed police dispatch.”
“There was some conversation about when they should do it, they might be recognized if they do it in Danville, and I think they did talk about some different locations …” Police Chief Tony Gray said. “Somewhere in the conversation, my name was brought up.”
Dispatch triangulated the location “from key words, including the mention of Chief Gray's name.”
If these guys don’t get direct entry into MENSA…
Chief Gray and other officers apprehended the men in the parking lot, discovering a mask on one of them. It takes a certain level of intelligence to be a successful criminal, and at the top of it, make sure you’re calling 911 while you’re laying out the details.
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We know that complaining about "Karens" has gotten old, but that's really this obnoxious anti-masker's name. It makes perfect sense that she'd be in trouble for refusing to leave the store because she wouldn't wear protection. Thanks to the Brook Park Police Department, this Karen got the kind of justice she deserved.
Via Sheboygan Press
If you're interested in the full story of this big ol' crying mugshot, you can read it on the Sheboygan Press here.
