kim kardashian

restraining order,kim kardashian,florida,kanye west
Via: TMZ
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TMZ reported April 8 that an inmate has taken a case to court to keep Florida rid of Kanye West and Kim Kardashian.

"Wayne Albright -- who's been locked up since 2000 for attempted sexual assault -- claims Florida needs protection from the couple he calls 'Meat Whistles' and 'Moose Knuckles.'

Albright shows abject contempt for the famous duo, declaring the only tolerable Kardashian is Rob, who's 'eating himself out of house and home, no doubt from the shame he feels as a result of what Kim has done to the Kardashian name.'"

Albright seeks a temporary restraining order against the family, protecting the fragile coastal ecosystem from the terrible disruption Kayne can cause.

He wants to "ban these two Moose Knuckles from appearing on any television programs aired in the state of Florida, unless it's Court TV and they're on trial for posing as a famous couple."

Speaking to the judge, Albright said, "You have your work cut out for you ... so what do you say? Make us all proud."

iphone,facepalm,kim kardashian,mobile games
Via: iTunes
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I wish to the powers that be that I was not making that headline up. From what I can gleam in skimming the description (because anything more than a quick skim would cause a mortal's face to melt like in the end of Raiders of the Lost Ark) the game is about your rise to fame through photoshoots and modeling. And there's a rival named Willow, or something. When the servers for the game went down this weekend, people were none too pleased about it:

These are all grown-ass adults. Good night, everyone.

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