It's like a white-collar Jean Valjean who has a job, but is still so poor that he has to steal energy bars in order to feed his family. He is hunted down relentlessly by coworker Javert.
~Office Lackey Jack
"Yeah, wine! Y'know, blood of Christ and all that?"
"... wine in a can, ma'am?"
"Uhh... the Lord works in mysterious ways okthanksbye!"
If this doesn't stop your coworkers, nothing will and they are evil.
LOL! Balrogs are illiterate!