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Via: Jesus Christ
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Who knew you could get a real crown of thorns on Amazon!

The jerkoff artists of the world probably don't give a shit about the latest proclaimed condemnation of masturbation being some sort of disease causing evil on the world. The only condition a dude is bound to retract if he spends too much time making besties with his strong hand and a bottle of the Lubriderm (or whatever) is a crippling hand cramp with a side of tendonitis.

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Via: Daym Drops
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Trying to save me some pizza-ordering disasters before they happen? Now that guy is a hero I can believe in. #AmericanHero

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