A Sad Day in the Life of a Picnic Table

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A Sad Day in the Life of a Picnic Table
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"Long, long ago, this table was a majestic specimen, useful, and new. However, years of use have rendered it shabby and useless. It was destined to become firewood, but then someone with a large heart (and appreciation for picnic tables) took pity on it. It now serves as a conversation piece."

Was I the only one who read that user's description in David Attenborough's voice?