I thought Blackberry had a nice ring to it. Turns out that name was taken...
"The laser in my magic mouse broke, so I did what any normal kludger would do, glue a mouse with a working laser to the bottom."
Bravo! You know what they say: "two mice are better than one!" Or is it "kill two mice with one stone?"
Go get a sno-cone or something! At the very least plug your computer in outside and play Civilization V on your back porch...