Good choice on taking the ladder position sir, for all of our sakes.
Don't feel like climbing all over the roof to install your satellite dish? Then follow this easy 7-step process!
Or as I like to call it, "The Pyramid of Increased Insurance Premiums."
They must have been having a fire sale.
One leg of the ladder too short? Just get a bucket!
Sorry buddy, but I'm trying to escape from a fire, not my earthly existence...