"This is how we do it in Brasil, although hopefully it won't be like this for the 2014 World Cup."
So, would a Brazilian kludger be a "kludgeador?"
C'mon, we all know that the internet is a series of tubes, right?
One elastic band, a bit of soldering and this "dead" 3G dongle lives!
Components: android phone, electrical tape, ladder, 2x2 beam and a power adaptor for long operating time. Works. Checkmate.
Tape, energy, cables, so easy... what're you lookin' at? It's working well, that's what matters!