The simplest solution is always usually the best. In most cases the simplest solution is just buying a new one.
It's just so hard getting turned on all the time. ~Not-So-Handy Andy
From the submitter:
Gas station next to my hotel. It's fully operational - I went and got gas there myself.
Note to self, never get my suspension checked here.
We need to vacuum. What's the most precarious place we can put all of our electronics?
Something tells me this isn't the best hardware store to ask for advice. ~Not-So-Handy Andy