I was trying to come up with a third pun in the caption, but I think the title is cringe-worthy enough. What do you guys have?
Just be careful when you light a match. ~Not-So-Handy Andy
Another possible solution: The Dark Tower. You just might not want to read the ending though, lest your anger cause you to topple your creation.
Where's Flava Flav when you need him?
The English really aren't known for their avant-garde art.
This single core machine runs at a cool 60 seconds/minute speed.