This is the Man Arrested for Assaulting His Wife With a Chicken Sandwich

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From the Des Moines Register:

The man accused of throwing a McChicken sandwich at his wife reportedly broke the woman's nose during the incident, police said Thursday.

Sgt. Jason Halifax, a spokesman for the Des Moines Police department, confirmed that Marvin Tramaine Hill II, 21, did more damage than police initially thought after smashing a sandwich bun into his wife's face Tuesday afternoon. Halifax said charges against Hill will likely be amended to simple domestic assault causing bodily injury.

"It doesn't matter what instrument is used to commit the assault ... ," Halifax said. "Domestic abuse is a huge problem. The greater issue is this guy is getting angry over a sandwich."

This is Australia, so Of Course They're Delivering a Beached Whale to Disposal

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And of course, ALSO because this is Australia, here are some dudes trying to ride on it while sharks are around:

Ethan is the App That Wants You to Ask Any Question in the World, and One Live Person Will Answer it

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Ethan is the app lets you anonymously message one Ethan Gliechtenstein, who will (time pending) send you a pithy response. Assuming he's not asleep.

Download the new Cheezburger app for a chance to win a PS4! in Cheezburger 's Hangs on LockerDome