Funny but sad

Pretty please?

There's a split second every morning where fed-up employees weight the pros and cons of being fired if they don't get up. On one hand you lose your livelihood, your bills will stack up, and you'll be considerably more unemployable, but on the other hand, you get to stay in bed for 30 more minutes.

Some people's brains are hardwired to be a tiny bit stranger than most, and before you say 'well everyone is entitled to their own opinion', I absolutely agree, the two don't necessarily contradict one another. Along with the right to free speech comes the right to judge . And if you're looking for opinions, simply look up 'Reddit', or more specifically, r/unpopularopinions. There you will find brave souls who take an anonymous stand. If you take things personally, you might not want to pay thi…

Are you already on your fifth cup of coffee and it's only 10am? After what always feels like a short weekend, that sweet bean juice is all that can boost your spirits. Although there are some days, despite coffee's best efforts, that you're still dragging.Although there are some days, despite coffee's best efforts, that you're still dragging. It's probably because your work is futile and even though they promised you a "fast paced environment", time comes to a standstill the moment you clock in.

Coming back from a weekend with a drinking holiday is always brutal. Sure, there was a time when St. Patricks day had nothing to do with pinching people, wearing green, or drinking your weight in dip-dyed beers, but that was back when people didn't have to clock in to work on Monday mornings at 8AM. However, some of us have been spiraling in that hungover, Monday-morning moody attitude for decades, wondering when our bonuses are coming and calculating how many more years we have to work until

What is time?

Being a corporate suit is like being a hamster in a cage. Your life is pretty plushy, but at the end of the day, all you do is run around on that little wheel of yours, while you mindlessly imagine what it's like in the real outdoors. The corporate cage turns nepo babies, rich folks, and country club members into feral wolves, while it turns the rest of us into handsome blonde rodents with a 2 year life span . Hang in there, Hamtaro, the wheel will keep spinning even when you stop running, so p…

Hey Siri, how do you say, "I quit my job, I have no money, please don't rob me" in Spanish?

It seems like every time you clock in a little piece of you gets eaten away. Work has that effect on people, especially in the corporate world. Just because you “spice up” your cubicle with pictures of tropical vacations doesn't mean you're any closer to getting that week-long PTO request approved. And just because you do excellent work in your department doesn't mean you're going to get that raise– in fact, your boss will probably just give you more work to do as a reward for your success. If…

Commuting to work must be the biggest waste of time known to man. You sit in traffic on the freeway for 45 minutes with a stale drive through coffee in your hand, meetings to panic about, and road rage in your heart . Now imagine if your office was only 10 steps away from your bedroom? 20 steps away from your kitchen and fully stocked cupboard? Not only do you have full access to all of the luxuries of home (snacks, good coffee, comfortable pants, and your pets), but your "commute" takes about…

Your day can easily be broken up into thirds: ⅓ of your day is spent sleeping, ⅓ of your day is spent running errands and keeping your life on track, and the last ⅓ of your blasted life, is spent creating spreadsheets for a nepo baby CEO who needs constant handholding to get through the workweek and is paid 10x your salary. We don't like those numbers, but the numbers don't lie. That last ⅓ of your life is sucking 100% of your energy and costing you your rapidly aging complexion. If you're Goog…

Everyone hates scams, in all their ugly forms, and that includes those pesky spam phone calls from ‘unknown’ numbers that provide that all too familiar shady feeling in your stomach. Sometimes curiosity might get the better of you, so you pick up, and hear that convincing tone saying, ‘Can you hear me?’. After which you reply, ‘Yes’, they immediately launch into their race of a conversation.

I'm a freak in the Excel Sheets

Yikes...

Just make sure you always have your mic and camera off during a Zoom call