food

No matter how you slice and dice this dark and twisted discovery, that right there broheme, is a condom, the wrong kind of plastic baggy, an entirely unwanted chef's twist. Truly, what fresh hell is this? And the shit-coated excuse of a customer service dialogue that follows thereafter is unbelievable in every sense of the word. Bro, you seriously want us to believe that's a jar of foam? We can see the RING!

wtf,gross,jelly,food,weird
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They don't call it the 'ice cream' of the future for nothing. What we can see in this conversation here, is the beginnings of a long and fruitful friendship between likeminded bros that have an appetite for spontaneity and yes, of course, the Dippin Dots. Nobody go telling DJ Trump's main ice-cream hating henchman, Sean Spicer about all this though...because Dots Bro is the REAL MVP.

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And we're back at it again with the weekly platter of our favorite shamelessly slutty tacos. Taco Tuesday is a comfort to the soul, and if anything helps pick up the positive momentum to truck through the Tuesday Blues for that sweet halfway mark we call Hump Day. 

tacos,yummy,food
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fail gross bagel is cheetos flavored
Via: Junkbanter
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When it comes to bagels, I’m a bit of a purist. Only one toping for me: Everything. There is no in between. I want to bite into poppy, garlic, sesame, and salt in a single bite. So the sudden swell of gimmick bagels has hit me particularly hard.

The latest one comes from The Bagel Nook in Freehold, NJ, where they’re making *gulp* Flamin’ Hot Cheetos bagels. Yeah, a bagel flavored like a Cheeto. 

via GIPHY

And you can get “Cool Ranch cream cheese” on it.

via GIPHY

We are through the looking glass here people. It’s time to standup for what’s right and show these people that playing God is an abomination of nature. Some things were not meant to be tampered with.

Would you eat this thing? Sound off in the comments, and if one of you wiseasses asks "cruchy or puffed," I'm just going to lose it. 

Literally though. These tacos were born for this glorious day. Get it? 

Well, I'm definitely dual-wielding some uncontrollable drooling and violent stomach growls now, and shit, I just had that crazy little thing called a breakfast. But hey, leave it to some slutty tacos to awaken the senses and that mad hunger. The lineup here is absolutely on point, so break out your best imaginary food bib and pretend like you might actually bite into one of these titillating tacos.

tacos,yummy,food,win
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