condoms

Well, it's come to this a the world's first Smart Condom.

Now before you go slapping thing on your little dickie, you should know that this isn't really a condom, so much as a FitBit for your wiener. It is a ring that slides over your condom and tracks your thrust velocity, calories, burned, the amount of times you had sex, your girth, and can even detect chlamydia and syphilis — perhaps the only two useful things it does. This does not, I repeat does not, act as an actual birth control measure. It's just gamifies your sex life. 

People are on the fence about this thing, but they definitely like making fun of it.

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We're a real classy organization here at Fail Blog. We wear tuxedos, monocles, top hats, etc. I drink a martini, for crying out loud. So if you think we're going to post a bunch of tweets or people playing with condoms, you've got another thing coming. 

Just kidding! Had you going for a minute there. Enjoy the condom stuff! 

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