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This week in Springfield, Illinois the forces of evil have emerged victorious.

Mayor J. Michael Houston has awarded G.I. Joe’s nemesis Cobra Commander the key to the city.

“Springfielders near and far, I accept your Mayor’s generous gift,” he said. “And let it be known that I too bring a gift for every man, woman and child of this city that is so near and dear to my heart; an invitation to join with me. Join Cobra!”

It makes a lot of sense, considering Springfield served as a secret base for the villain and his forces in the cartoon.

The stunt is actually a promotion for the upcoming G.I. Joe convention which will be held in the city, which they describe as the “mythical home of COBRA,” from April l9-12.

So now you know, and knowing is half the battle.

Here’s a supercut of Cobra Commander shouting at everyone because that’s just what he does and will continue to do in Illinois now that they’ve welcomed him with open arms.

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Via Metro
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Via Metro:

A man in Shijiazhuang, Hebei Province, China, decided to pay for his new 51,800 Yuan (£5,552) car using just coins.

According to the salesman, the customer warned him about the currency he intended to use before placing the order, so he can’t really be annoyed.

‘He said he’ll pay in petty cash. I thought it was old and small notes, but never expected they are all in small denomination coins,’ he said.
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Via NY Post
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From the New York Post:

For months doctors searched for a way to awaken Li, but to no avail. It wasn't until his family revealed what he loved most in the world that they found their key to success.

"We had asked his family what really drove him, and they were very clear that it was money," Tang said. "When we learned about his fondness for money, we experimented with notes and change.

"Memories of smell and sound can be very powerful stimulants," he added. "We found that a crisp, new 100 yuan note crumpled under his nose worked best."
Via TMZ
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Britney Spears' little sister broke up a fight at a Pita Pit in Hammond, LA last month, and thanks to TMZ, you can now watch the whole thing go down.

Her friend was caught in the middle of the scuffle, so she went behind the counter and grabbed a large knife which she then used to threaten the brawlers until they stopped.

The last time a member of the Spears family frantically waved around a deadly weapon was the Great Bald Britney Paparazzi Umbrella Attack of 2007.

Maybe Jamie Lynn has a future in law enforcement if the singing career doesn't work out?

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CEO of News Corp Rupert Murdoch (aka the "Lord Voldemort" of media moguls) posted a very controversial message on Friday, saying that all Muslims should be held responsible for the actions of Islamic extremists.

He also added that "political correctness makes for denial and hypocrisy."



His tweets come just a few days after the terror attack on Charlie Hebdo in Paris.

Needless to say, this statement did not go over well with people online, especially the 23 percent of the world's population whom he just accused of terrorism.

But over the weekend, "Harry Potter" author J.K. Rowling came to their defense, firing back at Murdoch with this absolutely perfect Tweet.



She also took responsibility for the Spanish Inquisition, all Christian fundamentalist violence and televangelist Jim Bakker.

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There were 3.7 million people at this weekend's anti-terrorism rally in Paris – the largest in French history.

One of those people was Albanian Prime Minister Edi Rama, who wore this simple, yet powerful symbol of solidarity in his jacket pocket.

Rama used to teach at the Academy of Arts of Albania and was an artist himself for years. As mayor of Tirana, he organized a mural project to transform Soviet-era ruins into colorful works of art.