And who can blame them? They clearly have all the style they need already.

For faster service, please have sample ready to go!

I know what you're thinking. Maybe it's not what it looks like. Maybe, just maybe this is not what the modern funeral has devolved into. And to that I respond with this:

Butthole is unacceptable, but douche canoe gets a free pass. This makes perfect sense, because "douche canoe" has been scientifically proven to be the sixth-most hilarious two-word phrase in the English language.