A Toast to That!

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A Toast to That!
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No attempts at humor here, just the truth. Let that one sit with you for a second.

No No, It's a Deeper, COOLER, V-Neck, See?

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No No, It's a Deeper, COOLER, V-Neck, See?
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Not shown: American Apparel - $35 (and you feel a little gross for wearing it).

Weird, Because I'm Looking For Someone Who Wears Everything on His Sleeve...

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Weird, Because I'm Looking For Someone Who Wears Everything on His Sleeve...
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DATING - PERSONALS:

"Totally cute and awesome goth chick looking for elder-statesmen straight-shooter who is totally only into goth chicks for NSA fun-times. Must be partially bald and otherwise physically unfit. No scammers or frauds."

Printed in: "The Daily WILL NEVER EXIST," Vol. X Issue: IN YOUR DREAMS.