This Can Only End Well

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This Can Only End Well
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I can only hope the runway is durable and well-enforced.

We Don't Take Kindly to Athletic Footwear Around Here

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We Don't Take Kindly to Athletic Footwear Around Here
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Just remember: Comfortable and stylish athletic shoes are the gateway to DRUGS AND VIOLENCE.

What Kind of Establishment Are We Talking About Here?

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What Kind of Establishment Are We Talking About Here?
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I mean, that sounds like a fantastic deal, I'm just not sure if it's something you want to be advertising to just anybody. People will get the wrong idea, you know.

Do Us All a Favor and Abide By the Rules, Please

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Do Us All a Favor and Abide By the Rules, Please
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I'm not sure where this is, or who it is who declared this to be official store policy, but I'm shedding a tear of joy for you right now. Thank you. Just. Thank you.

A Toast to That!

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A Toast to That!
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No attempts at humor here, just the truth. Let that one sit with you for a second.