Come on now, we know those pants need to be at least three sizes larger to be fitting of that logo.

"So, an '80s futurist, a redneck, a douchebag, and your high school prom date walk into a bar..."

You know how it is, sometimes you're just surfing the internet, minding your own business, and then you just get the weirdest urge to be the most kawaii being desu in all of desu the land desu desu desu.

I mean, looking like the living anatomy of a toy doll is one thing, but it takes something truly amazing to have a body that looks like it's in a constant state of Photoshop in real life.

And can I do it all while looking like Lara Croft? Really? I can? Sweet.

Or alligator, as the case may be.

Truly this is the style of the fashion patricians.