(My dad in response to Tyler, the Creator's "Bitch Suck Dick")
Dad: Did he just say he's f**king a unicorn?
Me: Yes, yes he sure did
Dad: I don't blame him.... I'd f**k a unicorn, they're sexy as hell.
(My date and I about to leave.)
Dad: Oh, and kids! Don't forget, stop teen pregnancy- take it in the ass!
Dad: What? I saw it online and thought it would come as great use to you.
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