Me: Mom, can I have a curfew? Mom: You already have one. Me: So, when is it? Mom: I won't tell you. Me: Then what's the point of a curfew? Mom: So we can punish you when you break it.

Me: I'm going to discipline my kids better when I have them. I'm going to lock them in a closet. Mom: Oh... That's what I did with you...